A Day in the Life of...

..just me, actually.
Did you pass someone on your way down acad lane with a smile on her face, trying to kick pebbles as far as possible in a straight line and humming the opening lines of The Carpenters' "Top of the World"?

Well, Hello then! I might not have greeted you when we crossed each other.
Then again...how many of us are aware of our surroundings in those states of extreme euphoria, when you are walking on air, head giddy with joy and heart pounding with excitement?

The reason for all the excitement and joy? Everything was either going right or seemed to be headed there.

Except...me falling asleep (I know...yet again) halfway through the conversation with a friend the previous night...man was he going to be mad!!That was the third consecutive time this week!!So after many attempts at a decent enough apology I finally settle on and muster enough courage to send him one.

Reply...reply...why doesn't he freakin reply? How much time does it take for one reply?..While we are waiting for his reply let me tell you about the both of us.

One could say we are real good friends, sharing an honest relationship which a lot of people aspire for. Really have to fight with oneself to get through a day without talking to the other person. (this trend set in a couple of weeks back).
We met through a common friend, never thought I’ll ever talk to him this much, let alone like him. But things change. Especially when you have a boringly 'peaceful' semester, loads of time to kill, a devil may care attitude and internet connection in the hostel room. But it's not so much the chat sessions last semester than the ones this time round. A couple of months into this semester...which includes roughly 50 hours spent on yahoo messenger(and that's just the lower limit),a couple on lanmsn(let's give everyone their due),a few more on sms,two trips to the beach(one not so pleasant) and a number of walks, I have a great testimonial on orkut..and an even greater friend from whom I know parting would be difficult.

But more on this later, as of now we have a reply, little grumpy but I know that's just a put on.What ensues is a marathon typing session (bless the creators of the nokia 1100 for real user friendly keys), giving many reasons to laugh, only to end in me snapping at him and closing the conversation very abruptly.
Damn! Our first quarrel as such...feels awful.

Now, I can be a very petty person at times, leading to uncalled for statements and arguments...So invariably am the first to apologize, sometimes even when it's not my fault.

After a lot of debate and pacing up and down the corridor, do the same and am now sitting in friend's room since I can't wait alone for a reply. Providing some entertainment here by tossing a coin to decide whether to return to the room to check for replies. Eventually do and realize that the fire's under control, not much damage done and just some residual smoke. (only in my room or so he says)

Neighbor announces dinner and we troop to the mess to gulp down the Friday special. Relief! at least it's rotis. Have just about enough to last me till next day's breakfast and I am back in the room, all alone. (room mate's gone off somewhere)
Switch on the computer with the intention of playing music, land up logging in on messenger...thinking here goes the rest of the evening.
For someone who got a 9 point GPA last semester, loves her courses this semester(though she doesn't seem to be doing too well in them) and has a quiz after the weekend, this is academic suicide. But I want a break, or so I tell myself and settle down with Vendhan's assignment (yeah I know...drab!!) to chat with whoever buzzes me.
By the way, status message read:
"Who do you need? Who do you love?
When you come undone"...scandalised a few people, but I can't help it if you haven't heard of Duran Duran!!

Well...my evening friend is the only one to respond (don't know whether it speaks of my popularity or friends being busy studying).Both of us not in the mood to study, so off we go, talking 'insane' as we fondly refer to it.

Initially, it’s him explaining the do's and the don’ts for a first-time alcohol session..laying down rules rather. Then an absolute no-no from him when I say I want to try weed.Hmmm...goes to the extent of emotional blackmail...here we go again...hate it when people say for my sake etc.Finally atones it by saying that obviously final decision is mine... whether it's the weed or the alcohol. All this is sort of weird coming from him...considering it is him this is coming from.

After a brief break because of me, I am listening to his account of a passing-out experience. Had heard a couple earlier... this one beats them.
Another break... someone's birthday. God! Why are these people wasting so much cake?
I'd rater go back and enjoy my insanity than watch this craziness.

In the mean time room-mate's returned, given me this weird look for being online, then a very I-knew-it-all-along glance after seeing who it is I am chatting with and finally settled to routine chatter. (Forgot to add that room mate and her boyfriend, who is this friend's ex-room mate have the notion that both of us share something similar to their relationship...well...thrown my hands up in the air when it comes to talking to them.)

Get back to him, only for him to take ages to respond. Screw him; I am going to oil my hair. Just start off and the ever-so-wanted orange starts flickering...will talk to him in a few minutes; let’s get the hands out of the oil for the moment. Get room mate to do some antics and type 'just a sec' without reading anything else in the window.

Finally, back from a rather long break. He furnishes a forgotten detail in his account and gets back to preaching, which, sadly he's good at. Has got me rethinking the entire thing which set off this conversation in the first place...nah, I am going to go ahead.

Another interruption, room-mate wants to check her offlines...aargh! Tell him so, assuring a return within five minutes.

Am very smug when I return, having taken far less than the quoted time. Explain this joke (yeah slightly sad) and tell him of one of my experiences...no passing out here just someone else's hopes that I do.

Ever counted your blessings? Only to wonder what you had done so right in life to deserve all the love and care you get? I am not counting my blessings but most certainly wondering what I have done right...at approximately 1:30-2:00 a.m. in the morning of 19th March,2005.It's difficult otherwise, now close to impossible.

On the one hand have returned to my initial euphoria (relating my experience was something...taints a marvelous day despite everything)
On the other hand...damn...I know I have crossed the thin line between attachment and...well I don't know what to call it. There's no way I can walk away without not giving a backward glance...not good.

Not good?..Why exactly am I being so euphemistic?..Spells disaster more like it...for both of us...I am sure that's the same thing going through his mind.
A few more messages and doubts are confirmed. He’s preaching using himself as an example...are these hints? Well, never one for tact, ask him so.No, apparently have got it all wrong.

Forrest Gump, that’s all that's running through my head right now. This is so like Forrest talking to Jenny...at different instances in her life...but right now it's all those talks rolled into one. It's not about him being Forrest (too crossed over on to the other side to be that); it’s about me being Jenny.

There is a way to be gentle with the truth, learning it right now. The truth by itself is bitter but can't hold him responsible for that (sorry for the throwing something at you message, man)

But he's just suggested I don't have principles or have forgotten about them...man! now you are getting preachy...start off to say something about it but the conversation takes a totally different turn and that's forgotten as we settle for more 'sane' fare.

A brief glance at the watch shows we've been chatting for 6 hours now (correction, on the whole 7 and a half, dude).We decide to continue as neither is sleepy. He suggests we talk about us in whatever time's left. Not bad, if only I knew what to say.Instead, I am just laughing my head off. Might as well sleep if there's nothing to talk about.

He says hold on, I know you are going to read the message archives sometime during the day...sms your comments. Damn...you are not supposed to know me that well..I am reading the archives already...need to know how much of Vendhan's time has been given to you. Principles...damn...topic change.
What do you say when someone asks you to say something sweet or which might induce sweet dreams? Tell them you are laughing because you don't know...apparently not...don't mention chocolate or blac mange either (whatever reasons you might have)...a good ol' cya and I am in Hypnos's land.

Late to bed, late to rise...don't know about most women...but makes me an edgy, unbearable ass...it's just the late rising part...missed breakfast...my favourite meal of the day.

Down to studying...lunch...back to studying...just plodding through the motions right now. Few more pages into Maths and it's time for my comments. (Could have put it off till later but principles kept playing the devil.)

Reply...reply...why doesn't he freakin reply? How much time does it take for one reply?..While we are waiting for his reply what else did I want to say...oh yeah, remember.

Aha...a reply at last...for a change he was the one sleeping but have the go ahead signal. For the next 15 to 20 minutes it's me typing furiously without any interruptions. I am done, pretty sure he's exhausted just reading my messages.

For all those who have seen Ghost will recall that Molly and Sam always say cya and never bye. It’s bye only when Sam's ghost is going to leave. Well, my friend and I do something similar, so my last message is with reference to us saying bye (he brought up the topic last night).Anyway, now we have got to the real acrid part of not just the conversation but life itself. And this calls for a few candid confessions. Swapped without hesitation...after all just told him in the wee hours of the morning that he'll always be my Mother Superior(would look very cute in the robes and all but I am talking on a more profound basis).

At the end of it all, I have the conclusion that both of us wear our hearts on our sleeves( as much as I hate to admit it... me too). Other than that, he says we don't have to worry about byes and all the strings attached for another 2 years...hope so.

Yes, all this is a killer... so we now have a deal.

We see how long we can go without messaging each other and who's the first one to fall..probably the hardest thing I have taken on this semester after linear algebra...but I think I need a reality check.

So now instead of talking to him, I have spent 3 solid hours writing about him...actually it is more about bouncing off my thoughts against someone and this is the most foolproof method I know...and of course preserving for memory his advice and his...I can't get the right word...it's not niceness or gentleness or goodness... but the mother of all synonyms for these qualities and more. (not that I am going to forget it...can't...even if I try... backup in case I ever have Alzheimer's)

Whoosh...should get my shut-eye now to be fresh for linear algebra tomorrow.
Next time you might just spot me singing "On a day like today.” Till then it's a very fidgety spirit signing off.