In My Place

I guess B. can testify that I've always had elaborate plans, no layouts, for my place. Though the exact number of bedrooms and the location of the den and the atelier keep changing, what does remain constant is the huge window, the loveseat by this huge window and the skylight in the bathroom. You'd know the latter if you've seen Home Improvement. The recent tv addiction has acquainted me with the newest Kohler product to be launched in India and that would be one super, super cool gadget to have at home. Beats out the Wii any day!

But I digress, the above paragraph was prompted by my choice of title, which is the Coldplay song. And that came to mind because of my initial choice, 'Criss-Cross', which represents the crissing and the crossing of ideas that follow.

Watched "Little Zizou" on Sunday. By myself. That will be the second time after "The Dark Knight". I think it's awesome to watch good movies by yourself, no loo interruptions, refreshment breaks, nothing. People may sometimes look at you like you're crazy but really, who cares!

The movie was all right. Funny in parts, escapist in other parts and oh-so-bloody-good in as non-Slumdog-Millionaire a way as possible. Really, get over it. And yes, it was also shot in Mumbai and had some very "real" depictions of the city as well.

I wanted to devote an entire post to this but the depressingly low levels of inspiration prompt me to include it in the present criss-crossing jumble. Hailing Slumdog Millionaire as "revolutionary" and a realistic portrayal of the giant that is Mumbai city is like saying Corbett and Kipling had the best picture of India in their respective novels and Gunga Din is the archetypal Indian; turban, rope trick, religious mumbo-jumbo and all. Ruskin Bond, with all his Indian roots in Simla and Doon and where not, is very, very slyly British. (I would know, I have read all his works) As is Mr. Danny Boyle. And for a Britisher, I must say, you absolutely do not know how to knot your tie! Grooming apart, the millions who have never been to India are probably going to come here with the impression fed to them by Mr. Boyle and are going to be quite disappointed. It could be my sheltered existence but what a let down to land here and find out that all tourist guides at historical monuments are not cheats, you do get sealed mineral water and chaiwallas often don't know Mahatma Gandhi, forget Benjamin Franklin. (If this has caused any confusion, let me clarify that I am not a big fan of Gandhi but I read this not so long ago in "Our No. 1 English daily") As for Mr. Boyle's opportune inclusion of "the real America" scene, it's classic make-hay-while-the-sun-shines. I do not disagree that some of the incidents depicted are very true but, please stop saying this movie has done India proud. And if you still have doubts, read Tarun Vijay's article about the same.

Tarun Vijay's article reminds me, while you're at it, show a finger to Nandita Das as well. Today, Our No. 1 English daily crowned her the "perfect 21st century Indian woman" For a woman who knows nothing about respect, this is quite an undeserved honour.

In conclusion to this burst, let's just say that it would be sad if we as a nation required Danny Boyle to tell us what we do and how we do it and where we do it wrong. Remember the German and hockey? Also, Slumdog can be in the realm of The Pursuit of Happyness, nothing more, nothing less.

All this talk about the foreigner's impression of India also reminds me of some other notes I made about Narayan's writing. I read somewhere that Shashi Tharoor is one of his biggest critics and have wondered since then why would someone criticise Narayan so? After all, he is the greatest Indian author of all time, move over the Anita's and Jhumpa's and Chetan's. But after greater deliberation, I conclude that depending on the context in which you read his books, they may appear slightly regressive. Like the sly Ruskin Bond, Narayan can be viewed as extremely humourous or someone straight out of the Middle Ages. Something to think about in the future. His observation skills, however, are second to none.

Something else to think about is how Bond and Narayan write about mundane triflings, like a fictitious meeting with Sherlock Holmes and Kipling or a time-table of study for a high school student, and are not charged with being pedestrian. Instead one reads in amusement and remarks how superbly someone so great has observed something so routine. The question here is, has this seemingly trifle detail shot them to greatness or can they pull off writing such trifles because of their greatness. The hen or the egg first?

And while I am at the social commentary, it's ironic how our "free press" writes unabashedly about infidelity, hailing it as the liberation of generations from our so-called bondage to not-so-sound beliefs (really?!!?). How articles about so&so's affair with so&so are most eagerly read at the breakfast table and can cover pages and pages. For one, as I rightly read somewhere, India is the new market for sleaze. For another, it's sad to note that the same "free press" will not tolerate voices contradicting popular opinion. Case in question: Amitabh Bacchan having to withdraw his initial comments on Slumdog. It's sad that even after Ram Jethmalani, Sanjay Dutt's very own lawyer, writes against Dutt being given a SP ticket, a significant portion of the people cannot be moved to voice this strongly. The only role our "free press" plays is to write about how his sister feels about him joining the SP (really, I didn't know it was accession to the throne time) and conduct opinion polls. Thankfully, the SC had some sense. Next news in the "free press" is how his wife is upset about him not having been given the ticket. Really, people, this is what you want to read when you wake up?

The IPL: I find it ironic that the EC wants to use MS Dhoni as its icon to promote the youth to vote but he himself will not be here to vote because the IPL has been shifted to South Africa. Also, our "free and secular press and No. 1 English Daily" presents only the UPA's point of view biasing all readers against the NDA and LKA. I'm not a fan of LKA but anything is better than the UPA government, Mulayam Singh with his regressive agenda and the Gandhi family running India like it's their monarchy. Not to forget the underhandedness in dealing with Omar Abduallah and any J&K issue. Anyone read Tarun Vijay's latest article about the rechristening of Anant Nag?

In light of UPA's nealy juvenile attempts to appear to please the Muslims, who are supposedly a minority, comes an ill-worded speech by Varun Gandhi. 30% Status Messages on my friends list read We agree with Varun Gandhi: Pro Hindu does not mean Anti Muslim. And we have all the ladies in the IPL suddenly developing maternal instincts and ready with discourses on how children should be brought up.

Nobody has the courage to touch the conversion issue in the South and North East with a ten foot long pole. The AIADMK's rise in the Assembly elections offers some consolation to Hindus from lower income groups. Jayalalitha's policies, and recently the BJP's in Karnataka, call the intervention of the Pope himself. Err, aren't we a sovereign democratic republic? The work done by the RSS in the North East has to be covert, for the fear of their lives. This is a bigger debate, worthy of an entire post. So, let's just leave it here.

I liked Mr. Tharoor's comment, "India is not, as people keep calling it, an underdeveloped country, but rather, in the context of its history and cultural heritage, a highly developed one in an advanced state of decay." It's perfect - to describe the common thread between all the criss-crossing and to end the post.

P.S. Old post. Thought I'd get it out of the way.